On the Road to Ordination - What Would Jesus Do? When you are an Interfaith seminarian and you decide to title your latest FB-based blogette entry “WWJD”, you better be really sure you want to use it now. You just can’t use this powerhouse heading every time you feel like making a big point. With apologies to those who don’t like using gun metaphors around a light being of such profound goodness, WWJD is a single bullet in a monster rifle - you pretty much only have one shot to slay the beast, so you better get it right.

That said, I’m using it now. I can think of no better use of summoning the power of the imagined thought and action of the GOD-MADE-MAN Christ to consider the sad, deeply painful and dangerous decision-beast that fear made today within one part of the (not so) United Methodist Church.
If you feel some resistance rising to what I’m writing, you are invited to stay and ride the wave of your discomfort into the land of learning.

BECAUSE HERE IT IS: You don’t think this matters? You don’t think there are lives at stake? If so, you may be a tiny bit too far from the ongoing suffering of Christ in the world. You might benefit from reading this poem which only suggests where people more like you and me in most ways than not, are now exponentially more afraid for their lives, for their children’s lives.

EVERYTHING I know about Jesus (and by now that’s way more than many) points to Him loving LGBTQ+ people and fighting for their full dignity and acceptance. For all we know, Jesus was gay or queer or bi, AND he had a friend or family member who was. He would likely have had a special narrative parable on the tip of his tongue to call back to Him, the “leaders” of the UMC, who hid behind fear, secular righteousness, and oppression to strip away the humanity and safety of this special, courageous group of HUMANS based on who they LOVE and how they SERVE. In the end, Jesus would call these fearful ones to love each other and care for each other with full equality.

Some may argue that Jesus was selective or that he was the author of the few bible phrases that get thrown around to justify this kind of non-sense, but I don’t believe that. There is no studied evidence that Jesus was mean or even concerned with pettiness, perpetuating injustice or disrespecting people in any way. And we know that Jesus never wrote any of that stuff.
Nope. Not What Jesus Did.

I believe God, or Jesus, the Divine, Beloved Community, Fellowship, or that Big Burning Sun Dieity-Thing, has a plan for which today’s heartbreak, the culmination of months and centuries of pain, will come to be seen as the inflection point where hate from a still scary few turned into fuel for the many, across so many lines, who live and work for Jesus’ unitive compassion and justice.

Let us pray:
Burn Hot and Fast, Sweet Lord. Use your Love to Open the hearts of your fearful. Re-Turn them to you and your Son Jesus. Ignite in them a passion to jump into the service of helping each other and healing our planet. And may all Your children be safe in Your great mercy and grace until LOVE becomes the only answer. Amen.

What Would Jesus Do? Is a powerful question. But it might keep you in your head, out of the Heat of Love.
A better question for love in action is: 

Having considered Jesus, What Will YOU Do?

Elizebeth's post was inspired by THIS POEM.

Siting quietly, close your eyes and take a few full breaths. Bring to mind a current
situation that elicits a reaction of anger, fear, or grief or a specific example of one of the
resistances that you just named... the things that seem to lure us away from our fully
awake, alive selves. The more fully you get in touch with the charged essence of the
story, the more readily you can access the feelings in your heart and throughout your
body. What is it about this situation that provokes the strongest feelings? You might see
a particular scene in your mind, hear words that were spoken, recognize a belief you
hold about how this situation reflects in you or what it means for your future. Be
especially aware of the feelings in your stomach, chest and throat.

In order to see firsthand what happens when you resist experience, begin by
experimenting with saying no. As you connect with the pain you feel in the situation you
have chosen, mentally direct of stream of no at the feelings. No to the unpleasantness
of fear, anger, compulsive behavior, shame or grief. Let the word carry the energy of
no- rejecting, pushing away what you are experiencing. As you say no, notice what this
resistance feels like in your body. Do you feel tightness, pressure? What happens to
the painful feelings as you say no? Imagine what your life would like like if, for the next
hours, weeks and months, you continued to move through the world with the thoughts
and feelings of no.

Take a few deep breaths and let go by relaxing through the body, opening up your eyes
or shifting posture a bit. Now take a few moments to call to mind again the painful
situation or resistance you'd previously chosen, remembering the images, words, beliefs
and feelings connected with it. Now direct a stream of the word yes at your experience.

Agree to the experience with yes. Let the feelings float, held in the environment of yes.
Even if there are waves of no- fear or anger that arise with the painful situation or even
from doing this exercise- that's okay. Let these natural reactions be received into the
larger field of yes. Yes to the pain. Yes to the parts of us that want to pain to go away.
​
Yes to whatever thoughts or feelings arise. Notice your experience as you say yes. Is
there softening, opening or movement in your body? Is there more space or oneness in
your mind? What happens to the unpleasantness as you say yes? Does it get more
intense? Does it get more diffuse? What happens to your heart when you say yes?
What would your experience be in the hours, weeks, months to come if could bring the
spirit of yes to the inevitable challenges and sorrows of life?
​
Continue to sit now, releasing thoughts and resting in an alert, relaxed awareness. Let
your tension be to say a gentle YES to whatever sensations, emotions, sounds or
images may arise in your awareness.

in the moments just before the dawn
the alarm sounded, the church bells rang
and the cry went out - Life threatened

circle the wagons of well worn ways
build up the buttresses of old belief
take shelter in familiar songs
fortify the foundations of faith
take custody of chapters
vindicate each verse
dig deep the trenches of tradition
lengthen the levies of liturgy

the dawn broke through
and those who could see
knew it was too late 
lifted the soul’s white flag
Love’s insurgency was complete

we come bearing gifts
like leaves from 
the book of our lives
symbols of our longing
remnants of our striving
inspired through hearts 
opened by the tumultuous 
ocean of time and toil

spools of thread
pallets of paint
feathers found 
cloth worn thin
water smoothed stones
and shimmering gems

artifacts from  
an old story
that once 
seemed true
but now fades
like a mist in 
the morning light

holy things
for holy people

holy too is the
mystery of 
how the parts 
will become 
whole and the
naked trusting
of deep wisdom

that the more beautiful
story is already written 
on our hearts
waiting be told
yet bears little
resemblance to 
that from which
the gifts were borrowed

what takes shape
from the offering 
of our gifts
is not a map
nor tool
nor god to
be praised

but an icon
a window 
through which
the Ancient Future 
comes and meets us
enveloping us
in Her sweet 
dark embrace
inviting us to
let go ….

into a New Story
the living of which
is the gift
of Life for
all people
for all creation
for all
for all
for all

Like the others 
I slept
unable to bear 
the weight 
of grief 

Your invitation
to abide
watch and pray
muffled by
echos of
anxious exhaustion

but now 
having witnessed 
how sorrow 
is absorbed 
by Love

and shadows
that covered
my fear 
and shame
dispersed by light

I will tarry here
in the garden of tears
as layer after
layer of hidden
wounds 

are kissed by
your resurrected
lips waking
parts of me
from their
long sleep

When in the soul of the serene disciple
With no more Fathers to imitate
Poverty is a success,
It is a small thing to say the roof is gone:
He has not even a house.
Stars, as well as friends,
Are angry with the noble ruin.
Saints depart in several directions.
Be still:
There is no longer any need of comment.
It was a lucky wind
That blew away his halo with his cares,
A lucky sea that drowned his reputation.
Here you will find
Neither a proverb nor a memorandum.
There are no ways,
No methods to admire
Where poverty is no achievement.
His God lives in his emptiness like an affliction.
What choice remains?
Well, to be ordinary is not a choice:
It is the usual freedom
Of men without visions.

Richard Rohr’s Commentary:

Merton's best-selling early autobiography, The Seven Storey Mountain, published in 1948, is a first half of life statement and a classic, which has never gone out of print.
 
The following poem, "When in the Soul of the Serene Disciple," [1] written by Merton ten years later in 1958, shows all the signs of a man in an early second half of life, although he was only in his mid-forties. The freedom illustrated here might be exactly where your spiritual journey is going to lead you. I hope so.
 
This poem has spoken to me from the first time I read it in Merton's hermitage in 1985. I offer it to you as a simple meditation that you can return to again and again to summarize where this journey leads us. Today we will focus on the first half of the poem, with my commentary in italics.
 
When in the soul of the serene disciple
 
At the soul level, and with the peacefulness of time
 
With no more Fathers to imitate
 
When you have moved beyond the "authoritative," the collective, and the imitative, and you have to be your True Self
 
Poverty is a success,
It is a small thing to say the roof is gone:
He has not even a house.
 
When you have made it all the way to the bottom of who you think you are, or need to be, when your humiliating shadow work never stops, and when your securities and protective boundaries mean less and less, and your "salvation project" has failed you
 
Stars, as well as friends,
Are angry with the noble ruin,
Saints depart in several directions.
 
When you have faced the hurt and the immense self-doubt brought on by good people, family, and even friends who do not understand you, who criticize you, or even delight in your wrongness
 
Be still:
There is no longer any need of comment.
 
The inner life of quiet, solitude, and contemplation is the only way to find your ground and purpose now. Go nowhere else for sustenance. 
It was a lucky wind
That blew away his halo with his cares,
A lucky sea that drowned his reputation.
 
This is the necessary stumbling stone that makes you loosen your grip on the first half of life and takes away any remaining superior self-image. (Merton is calling this crossover point "lucky" and surely sees it as part of necessary and good suffering that the soul needs in order to mature.)
 
Here you will find
Neither a proverb nor a memorandum.
There are no ways,
No methods to admire
 
Don't look forward or backward in your mind for explanations or consolations; don't try to hide behind any secret special way that you have practiced and now can recommend to all! (As we preachy types always feel we must do.) Few certitudes now, just naked faith.
 
Where poverty is no achievement.
His God lives in his emptiness like an affliction.
 
This is nothing you have come to or crawled down to by effort or insight. You were taken there, and your "there" is precisely nothing. (That is, it is "everything," but not what you expected everything to be!) This kind of God is almost a disappointment, at least to those who were in any way "using" God up to now. There is nothing to claim anymore. God is not a possession of any type, not for your own ego or morality or superiority or for control of the data. This is the nada of John of the Cross and the mystics, and this is Jesus on the cross. Yet it is a peaceful nothingness and a luminous darkness, while still an "affliction."
 
What choice remains?
Well, to be ordinary is not a choice:
It is the usual freedom
Of men [and women] without [their] visions.
 
In the second half of the spiritual life, you are not making choices as much as you are being guided, taught, and led--which leads to "choiceless choices." These are the things you cannot not do because they are your destiny and your deepest desire. Your driving motives are no longer money, success, or the approval of others. You have found your sacred dance.
 
Now your only specialness is in being absolutely ordinary and even "choiceless," beyond the strong opinions, needs, preferences, and demands of the first half of life. You do not need your "visions" anymore; you are happily participating in God's vision for you. With that, the wonderful dreaming and the dreamer that we were in our early years have morphed into Someone Else's dream for us. We move from the driver's seat to being a happy passenger, one who is still allowed to make helpful suggestions to the Driver. We are henceforth "a serene disciple," living in our own unique soul as never before, yet paradoxically living within the mind and heart of God, and taking our place in the great and general dance.